Weekend with Hubby...

Hubby and I have recently moved into a new home. Slowly we have been looking for furniture and things to decorate and make it our own. A friend of his told him that there was an art show this weekend in Miami and we decided that we would go. The last art show I went to was fabulous...we met several artist and bought some great peices that we put in our home in Jacksonville. I was sure that a show in Miami, a cultural meltingpot would bring a better group of artist and we would find much better peices. OK so sometimes I am wrong.

So off we went. We should have known something was wrong when we relized the only black folk there were the two of us and the guy that was the head of security.

Just on a side note:Why is it that you can get embarassed for the whole race by the action of one person?

The man who was handling security reminded me of Uncle Rukkus on the Boondocks; using words in the wrong context but as cofident as Jesse Jackson.

" Let me reiteriate again where I need you all to stand this morning patrons" Reiterate means again, my brother. What the hell are you saying? And in front of the white folk. My grandmother would have passed out at this moment. The white folk next to me loved this. You could here them giggling. I told Hubby that they were laughing at something else, not at Uncle Rukkus. He did not believe me. I told him there were many other things they could laugh at.

Then Rukkus spoke again. And sure enough, there was more that would cause a chuckle:

"All wheelchair recipients, please enter through the left door." I looked at Hubby. He just shook his head. I asked him if there was an extra price that I could pay that would allow me to receive a wheel chair. He told me to leave it alone.

Anyway once we got inside the art show there were NO ARTIST. What the hell? After looking around for awhile, I figured that they were just too embarassed to tell anyone that they created this mess. We walked around in utter amazement for about an hour. I have determined that sometimes folk just pretend that they like things because they want folk to think that they are smart. Hubby and I are not too good at this. Then it happened...Hubby came upon something he liked.

In the corner was a framed canvas. Blue letters were stenciled on it. It read:

ifyoudon
tlikeitt
hengetth
fuckouto
fmyhouse


Hubbby loved this and I thought that it would at least be an interesting piece to have up in the house. Then I read the price....$450,000 (yep you read that right). Now Hubby is an educated man. He has an advanced degree. Handles big business deals and has worked with local government. The cost of this 'art'rendered him quite dumb. Actually it left him stupid and ghetto for about an hour. He could not speak for a moment.

In each of these little booths was a snobby little woman, dressed in black. I think she was there to answer questions about the artist and take the checks of the fools that would pay almost half a million dollars for a painting that basically cussed out the visitors to their home.

He walked over to her. I knew this was going to be a problem.


"IS YOU SERIOUS?" (yes, he said 'is')


The snobby woman shook her head yes.


"Well, now I understand the term starving artist. They are starving because no one in their right mind would pay this. Hell, if they bring this down to $49.95 their ass would not be starving anymore!!"

That said, we left the art show.


I don't think we will go back next year.